Guess What I Heard?

Vote Zoomzoompow in 2012

The 2012 elections are coming up fast and the cess pool of candidates is filling up even faster. Campaign promises are being made quicker than they can be broken and the stupidity of American voters is reaching a fever pitch. So with that said, I thought to my self, “hey Sean, (shhh that’s my real name) you should like totally throw your hat into the race. I mean you couldn’t do any worse than the current yahoos, right? ” Right! So here we are. I’m officially in, hat and all.

Now I’m no politician but perhaps with the string of failures over the past couple decades, a novice with the intentions of making this once great nation the world power it was, is exactly what we need. I’m not muddled or tainted by politics or religion. I’m just a man who can look past the infighting and get shit done. Or at least I’d like to think that’s me. So come election time, write me in as your candidate for president and I promise shit like Free Ice cream Fridays, more art supplies for Mrs. Turners class and new uniforms for the girls volleyball team. Wait..no…I mean…yeah all that but more stuff too…for adults. No more tax cuts for these multinational corporations, more emphasis on innovation and education and a promise to do lots of other good shit. So Vote Zoomzoompow in 2012, “The Candidate that Gets Shit Done!”

I’m Zoomzoompow and I approve this message.