The War on Sugar, Salt and everything Tasty

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but there’s a war going on. A war on sugar, salt and all things tasty.

Today Disney announced that they would no longer allow junk food advertisements on their children’s channels to help fight childhood obesity. This unprecedented move
takes effect in 2013 cus why lose all those advertising dollars right? You have to give retailers time to pitch some other shit to kids.

New York Mayor Bloomeberg wants to not only ban salt, but he’s also going after sugar, not to mention his ban on Transfat.

In San Franscisco, the city passed a law banning toys in McDonalds Happy Meals in order to punish little fatties that shove burger after burger in their faces.

So, as you can see, the war is on.

But is a war on tasty, necessary?

When I was a kid, my parents didn’t let McDonalds and the Disney channel do the baby sitting. Hell, I didn’t even have the Disney channel and as for McDonalds, well fuck that shit. I hated McDonalds because I was convinced they put worms in their hamburgers. Don’t get me wrong, I ate my fair share of junk food. In fact, their was a summer where I lived exclusively off Twinkies, but I didnt do that inside in front of the T.V. for 12 hours a day. I was outside, running around and setting fire to shit…you know, getting in some exercise.

Not today’s kids. I know a kid that spent an entire summers vacation in his room playing a videogame, eating deep fried chicken strips, ice cream and raviolios.

Childhood obesity isn’t the fault of Transfat, Happy Meals, salt or Wendy’s milk shakes. It’s the fault of people.

For one, parents need to stop being so goddamned lazy when it comes to watching and feeding their kids. If they decided to take on the responsibility of children, they can’t just drop the ball and let them decide what they want and when they want it. They are kids, they haven’t earned that right. So parents, take some goddamn responsibility.

For two, bring back phys-ed in school. Teach kids to be active. Take out the goddamn pizza and sodas from school cafeterias. In fact, fuck cafeterias. I didn’t have a cafeteria when I was a kid. I made my lunch and if I didn’t, I went hungry or beat up some younger kid and stole his lunch so he’d go hungry instead of me. That’s the way things were.

Lastly, get rid of the 24 hours a day kids channels. Nobody needs to have cartoons available every moment of every day. Bring back after school cartoons and Saturday morning cartoons with all their public service announcements. Remember those? “Don’t Drown Your Food”, The Chomper, and Time for Timers, “Hanker fer a Hunka Cheese!”? I’m not fat so that shit must have worked.

In conclusion, give piece a chance. Make love, not war. Quit this hatred for all things tasty and start practicing moderation and responsibility…goddamnit!